Scary stuff

These days we're way past worrying about tainted Sweet Tarts slipped to unsuspecting little Harry Potters and Hermione Grangers on Halloween.

What's REALLY scary this year? Germs.

Parents are spinning from warnings about contaminated costume masks. Or potentially germy candy wrappers handed out by careless, sniffling neighbors. As darkness falls on Saturday evening, legions of children will descend on neighborhoods toting paper bags and hand sanitizer. Maybe some will take the issue head on and dress as H1N1. (Thank you Laura D. in Seattle!)

It still remains to be seen whether the virus is truly a widespread threat or another highly successful viral marketing campaign based on fear. Despite the flurry of recent panic, experts still note that even in kids--the highest risk group for this strain--swine flu has been relatively mild. More people overall may get symptoms, but so far it's not even close to the impact of the garden variety seasonal flu which kills about 36,000 Americans a year. So far, the CDC has confirmed 1,004 swine flu deaths.

(Meanwhile, according to the National Association of School Psychologists, every five hours a child or adolescent in the United States dies as a result of suicide. Kind of seems like chasing a mosquito in your living room while a tiger is sitting on your sofa.)

I attended church last Sunday, not a regular thing for me in recent months, but being a card- carrying Episcopalian I get a hankering for the comfort of ritual and community. After the customary handshakes and greetings during the peace, we settled in for the communion portion of the service. The pastor paused before heading up to the altar.

"We're being mindful these days, so now that we've shared the peace, we are going to share the Purell. Just take a bit and pass it on down to your neighbor."

Huh? I hadn't noticed the little bottles tucked into the end of each pew. I dutifully squeezed out a blob, rubbed and handed it down the line. The sanctuary filled with the peppery smell of alcohol and citrus. My nose itched. I tried not to scratch it before approaching the rail, lest I be sent back for re-sanitizing. I imagined the scene with Jesus after healing the leper,

"Hey Peter, could you hand me that Germ-x?"

Maybe the flu is a real threat. Maybe not. Time will tell. But most days what can really infect me is fear. It sends me into hiding, into hoarding, into survival mode. It pits me against you. It's contagious. And it's on every channel, every news site, because it sells stuff.

But, fear not! Vaccines are available: Turn off the news. Hug somebody. Or at least go dress up as a germ.

spookily yours,
cj